Ode To My Hairbrush

I have this hairbrush.
Everyone makes fun of me for it.
He's a tough guy.
He is missing many of his protective plastic balls which means that metal sticks impale my scalp on the daily.
But how do you know a brush is really working if you can't hear it ripping through your hair?
Also, i'm bad at getting rid of old things.
Exactly.

Adriana has been telling me for years that I need to suck it up and buy a new hairbrush.
But how could I get rid of something that has helped me through:
-Proms
-Boys
-Late night concerts
-Night swims/sprinkler runs
-Different houses
-Different states
-Hair crisis.

This brush has been covered with
-Blonde hair
-Red hair
-Brown hair
-Really really dark brown hair
-Red/Violet hair
-And every step back to blonde.

Well, my friends, today was the day.
I walked into Forever 21 and saw they were selling brushes for $3.25.
And finally, Adriana convinced me to get a new one.
So, tearfully, I am out with the old and in with the new.

I am not the proud owner of a hairbrush that won't tear my scalp to pieces and lets everyone know how I feel about them.